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Liz's Log Cont.
1/01/10
It is officially 2010! Who among us can even anticipate what our tomorrow's may bring? Depending on who you talk to, the projections can be as different as day is from night, but in my neck of the woods I'm seeing and hearing more along the lines of doom and gloom...I see plainly, the "she's a flipping lunatic" looks I get in many circles, when I happen to mention that it doesn't matter how big the problems get, God is still bigger. And this coming from someone who only claims to have faith as big as a fraction of that mustard seed...(whole mustard seed faith can move mountains according to Scripture...I've not seen a mountain move yet, so I'm assuming that means that my faith ain't quite there yet!)
I am anticipating extremely bright tomorrows because I still hear God whispering "Watch Me Work!" And to date His "Watch Me Work!" has been nothing short of miraculous. Am I anticipating heart ache, drama, catastrophe? We live in a Satan infiltrated world, so nothing would surprise me. But do I dread it? No, because God says, "Fear Not!" I will focus on placing one foot in front of the other, in the place that I am called upon to place it. It is a continuation of the resolution that I made way back on my diagnosis day...10/31/08.
On a noteworthy note...finally discovered the problems with my email...it appears that back a few weeks ago my website underwent some "upgrades' that included changing all of my email settings. You will notice if you visit my "Contact Page" that my email address is now new...which would explain clearly why I've not been able to receive any of the emails sent through my site, and only some squeaked through my computer the other way. So to all those who sent tests? I thank you...must have gotten a lot of them because I had many "undeliverable" things once all systems aligned themselves. Hopefully I am back up and running! If you feel so lead and would like to send a test through the site Contact Page I'd be very appreciative!
Love and God's Blessings!
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Daily Manna from the Net
Friday, January 1, 2010
Mark 1:22-27
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The people were amazed at his teaching, because he taught them as one who had authority, not as the teachers of the law. Just then a man in their synagogue who was possessed by an evil spirit cried out, 'What do you want with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are--the Holy One of God!' 'Be quiet!' said Jesus sternly. 'Come out of him!' The evil spirit shook the man violently and came out of him with a shriek. The people were all so amazed that they asked each other, 'What is this? A new teaching--and with authority! He even gives orders to evil spirits and they obey him.' Mark 1:22-27 NIV
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1/03/10
As is typical with this time of year; I'm always anxious for it to get here...but then I find myself more than anxious for life to get back to normal. What I've discovered is that when you couple the holiday hustle and bustle with a few health related concerns, normal becomes an oddity ~ So my life, I'm currently finding, has become trying to re-establish normal...I've forgotten what normal is supposed to look like so I find myself functioning in a disjointed fashion. I'm finding this to be a tad unnerving and the enemy jumps at any and all opportunities to keep me distracted and preoccupied with what equates to nothing short of nonsense regarding my concern with "normal"!
While I'm struggling with this self-imposed dilemma, and silently cursing myself for allowing my worries, I open a card from a new friend and she randomly shares with me her favorite bible verse..."Be still and know that I am God!" Coincidence? I think not! Talk about timing! In a moment I'm once again filled with that indescribable peace that assures me that all of my bases are covered, and not through any actions taken on my own. I'm no farther ahead in knowing what to anticipate regarding normal...but because it concerns tomorrow that is not to be my concern for today. All I have to concern myself with is knowing that tomorrow, as a believer brings with it hope! According to today's scripture tomorrow for the scoffers and unbelievers promises to not be so pretty...they should be the ones concerned...all I need to do is settle my backside back into my Creator's palm and keep my eyes and ears opened as to His direction...and hope and pray that God reaches out to the scoffers and unbelievers, opening their eyes and ears to a tomorrow filled with hope!
Love and God's Blessings!
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Daily Manna from the Net
Sunday, January 3, 2010
2 Peter 3:3-7
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First of all, you must understand that in the last days scoffers will come, scoffing and following their own evil desires. They will say, 'Where is this 'coming' he promised? Ever since our fathers died, everything goes on as it has since the beginning of creation.' But they deliberately forget that long ago by God's word the heavens existed and the earth was formed out of water and by water. By these waters also the world of that time was deluged and destroyed. By the same word the present heavens and earth are reserved for fire, being kept for the day of judgment and destruction of ungodly men. 2 Peter 3:3-7 NIV
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1/04/10
Oh happy day! Fric is back to school! Mr. Velcro is back to work! Life is very good! Too many bodies to trip over for too many days in a row around here! Even Wonder Mutt, who is taking full advantage of his new found space by sprawling out in my unoccuppied bed, seems relieved.
This afternoon restarts my doctor routines again ~ I've mixed emotions pertaining to all of that. It's been a nice reprieve from the waiting room shuffles, but progress can't be duly noted if it is not duly tracked and it can't be duly tracked without doing a few waiting room shuffles. So here's to getting back into routine!
My daughter announced yesterday that she doesn't think that my hair is going to return after gazing at my fuzzy scalp. She's never been to timid in stating what's on her mind at any given time. Her comment was along the lines of, "I don't think your hair is going to come back. You okay with that?" Of course my response was simply, "What choice do I have?". When it's 7 degrees outside I truly miss my hair! When it's 90, I don't. When you're female and bald and standing in line at the grocery store, crabby people don't snap at you...they smile because they realize that whatever it was that was making them crabby, likely was nothing compared to what made someone like me lose all of my hair. When I look in the mirror every morning I have to make the decision on whether to apply eyeliner or stuff a stubby cigar between my teeth...I can go either way convincingly with a big enough sweat shirt!
What fuzz I have is pretty thin, and my scalp is indeed sensitive...just like was promised~but my daughter's comment prompted me to do some googling, not only regarding my baldness but all areas of whole brain radiation effects. I was pretty surprised by what I found! My hair should return, but it will probably be much thinner and an entirely different texture...that's not what surprised me...what surprised me was the fact that whole brain radiation can cause brain tissue to continue to die for up to 2 years following treatment! Fatigue, extreme fatigue (which I've been wrestling with daily for the past 3 weeks and eagerly anticipating improvement in) can and will plague me for up to 2 years! Naps have just become my life! Hmmm, guess this is a glimpse of my new normal! I've got to learn how to pace myself, according to the "what to do's and what not to do's" on "Life after whole brain radiation". This may very well be why Dr. Gamma Knife was anxious to promote his procedures, being these long term effects don't tend to follow Gamma Knife. Although I still have no regrets in going whole brain. Given my circumstances I still feel it was the direction I was to take~ Oh but a few added steps in this journey called life!
Love and God's Blessings!
As soon as they left the synagogue, they went with James and John to the home of Simon and Andrew. Simon's mother-in-law was in bed with a fever, and they told Jesus about her. So he went to her, took her hand and helped her up. The fever left her and she began to wait on them. That evening after sunset the people brought to Jesus all the sick and demon-possessed. The whole town gathered at the door, and Jesus healed many who had various diseases. He also drove out many demons, but he would not let the demons speak because they knew who he was. Mark 1:29-34 NIV
1/5/10
Once again I have to marvel at what God shows me in my backyard...7 brilliant red cardinals (and only 1 female ~ lucky chick!) In no other home that I have lived in have I seen such a thing. Cardinals are my very favorite bird ~ always have been; and it has pleased me each and every year to have a pair return to nest in the tall pine tree of what was once our back yard.
What equated to tossing some old sunflower seed in the woods behind our new home, that had been discovered upon unburying a very buried garage, has evolved into this incredible daily showing of beautiful red brilliance in a very gray and cold season. Again I am reminded of God's promise in providing abundantly to those who choose to serve and follow Him. 7 bright red cardinals certainly can be defined as 'abundantly' from where I sit.
Yesterday's doctor appointment amounted to not much more than an appointment in which to schedule all future appointments. The scans will begin again...shall be my life every 3 months for a spell ~ then every 6 months ~ then every year...in other words; I'm not to let myself venture into that "life away from doctors" mode of thinking for awhile. My bare head in January was a bit too deja vue, yesterday...silly me! After freezing the dome last January I was foolish enough to allow myself to assume that the next (as in this) January would be far better! See what assuming gets ya? The realization that ya need much warmer hats, if you're me! Life is good and always a gift!
Love and God's Blessings!
1/06/10
Doctoring today.
1/07/10
Currently being weaned off of the steroids...which is a big yippee! But it brings with it some pretty intense headaches...reading, writing, looking into computer screen with detox headache is beyond pleasant ~ shall return when the bean stops pounding! Bones scanned yesterday; awaiting results.
Love and God's Blessings!
1/14/07
I have been experiencing some major "technical difficulties" with my website. For the second time in my history with a website I have been infiltrated by some porn hackers; this time resulting in damage to my computer's hard drive and again blocking my email. I'm guessing that that is just the tip of the ice berg, based on previous experience! Still working at restoration of "Liz's log cont." Bare with me!!
Also received some good news last night after having to experience the ER again, due to my plumbing shutting down. The deep bone pain that has kept me from being able to function for the past 6 weeks is the result of a spinal spasm, not bone cancer as was originally suspected. Initial readings indicated that my bone scan is completely clear. The pain and numbness should subside eventually now that I've been put on a routine of muscle relaxants, anti-inflammatories and pain meds. I should be up and running again shortly!...and yes, the plumbing has been restored....Praise God!
Love and God's Blessings!
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